Special Times. . .

Recently, David took Colt camping on a Father/Son camping trip. It took them over 2 hours to get to the campsite via various transportation, but they both said it was worth it! Colt LOVES to explore nature and had a blast sleeping OUTDOORS in his tent (since we have camped on indoors a few times since we moved here). It’s especially nice to get out of the hustle, bustle, crowd, and pollution of the city! I was thinking Caden is probably old enough to go next time 🙂

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Meanwhile, Caden, Kylie, and I had some fun of our own. This last trip we stumbled upon a fashion show with live music and a terrifying looking clown (if I do say so myself). They kids enjoyed it – not so much the clown:)

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Part of Funeral Customs in Asia

We encountered our first wake this past week. It was right outside of our apartment building, so we walked through it for the 2 days that it was going on. It was quite interesting. . . and sad at the same time.

So, I went home and did some research. This was pretty interesting to me since funeral homes are a Curry/Stevens family business you know 🙂

According to my research, the coffin is not sealed during the wake. Food is placed in front of the coffin as an offering to the deceased. The deceased’s comb is broken into two — one part is placed in the coffin and the other is kept by the family.

During the wake, the family does not wear jewelry or red clothing (red is the color of happiness). Traditionally, children and grandchildren of the deceased did not cut their hair for 49 days after the death, but this custom is now usually only observed by older generations.

An altar for burning incense and a lit white candle are placed at the foot of the coffin. Joss paper and prayer money (to provide the deceased with sufficient income in the afterlife) are burned continuously throughout the wake. Funeral guests are required to light incense for the deceased and bow as a sign of respect to the family. There will also be a donation box since money is always offered as a sign of respect to the family of the deceased. This money will also help the family defray the costs of the funeral.

During the wake there is usually a group of people gambling in the front courtyard of the deceased’s house because the corpse must be “guarded,” and gambling helps the guards stay awake during their vigil. This custom also helps to lessen the grief of the participants.

We saw the altar where incense and paper money was being burned. . we also saw people playing games and eating. There were people present around the clock for 2 days. Then it was all gone. Really quite an interesting part of this culture!

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We have become Foodies :)

When we first moved to the province of Sichuan. . . we knew the food here was famous for it’s spiciness. We have fallen in love with it! We seriously can’t get enough! So, we eat Western breakfasts, and Sichuan Chinese food for lunch and dinner. . . We have already been talking about how much we are going to miss the spicy sichuan food when we move, and that’s a year or more away! 🙂 Our tutor is constantly laughing at us for several reasons – 1) the words we remember best are associated with food in some way, or our experience at a local restaurant 2) we eat the spiciest and even the numbing spicy foods/sauces like the best of the Chinese she says. All the shop owners love it when we leave a spotless plate or bowl.

I’ve probably said this before, but the first time I ate fish with chopsticks I thought it was a lot of trouble because the fish are full of teeny tiny bones. . . but alas, my favorite dish has turned out to be this fish with tons of chopped veggies and peanuts in an extremely spicy sauce! I think David and I have finally figured out how to get the meat off the bone huh?
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Now this egg you see pictured is called “century egg, thousand year old egg, hundred year old egg, or millennium egg.” The egg (which can be chicken, duck, or quail) is covered in some type of mixture of clay, ash, salt, quick lime that hardens and looks like cement. Somehow, this mixture hardens around the egg and results in a cured edible egg rather than a spoiled egg.

I most note. . . neither of us really cared for this special food.

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Kylie and Han Han

This is Kylie’s “baby” that she “takes care of” at her school. It’s funny because he seems to be her motivation and favorite thing/person about going to school! Kylie really tries to take care of him. The teachers tell us that she feeds him and gives him drinks of water. They also say she hugs him all the time and comforts him when he cries. One of the teachers told me she doesn’t care for any of other kids in this same way, and that there is something special there. . . She was kissing his forehead the other day for no reason which made me smile because they are actually about the same size!
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Happy Mother’s Day 2014 Mom/Nana and Mama T/Grandma!

I came across http://www.djiboutijones.com/2014/01/a-letter-to-the-grandparents-of-my-third-culture-kids/ that I shared with our moms several months ago. . . so I decided to personalize it and share. Kind of like a Hallmark card. I didn’t pen them, but I mean them 🙂

I don’t really remember when, or if, we officially told we would be moving overseas. . . or specifically this FAR overseas.  But I also don’t remember you trying to talk us out of it.  That “we” included not only your son and daughter, but now also your 3 grandchildren.  Caden was only 10 months old when we left.  You weren’t the only ones who thought about him growing up, and that he may not really “remember” you or “know” you.  I think about that a lot.

We sold most of stuff, packed up all of the rest and stored them in your closets and work buildings. We uprooted our little family, and we left. Again, I don’t know what that was like for you, but I can imagine. I know you were supportive, loving and encouraging.  But, I also know it probably broke your heart and crushed some of your world . . . the dreams and convenience of family living close, doing life together, watching the kids grow up, holidays and birthdays, etc.

Sometimes I want to apologize to you for making that part of your life difficult, or causing you cry at times because we are far away.  Sometimes I want to apologize for not being there birthdays, celebrations (like Mother’s Day), family gatherings . . . and for you not being able to be here for ours.

But, though I wish there wasn’t pain involved, I don’t have regrets, not when I think about the ultimate picture and ultimate end 🙂 If only we could live in two places at once . . . one would be there in the States, and one would be on this wild adventure that we are on. But that can’t really happen now can it? So instead, I will simply say thank you. Thank you for not saying “Don’t go.”

Thank you for raising David and I with a vision for the world. Thank you for teaching us to work hard, to trust, to have a vision, and to love. Thank you for helping us pass these qualities on to your grandchildren.

Thank you for crying when we left but for never making us feel guilty. Thank you for making space in your homes for our boxes and space for our bodies when we come back to visit! Thank you for giving your grandchildren a safe place to talk about their experiences, for being interested in their lives, for seeing that they are content and happy . . and for being excited with them and for them!

Thank you for being willing to visit!  For being willing to make this 30 hour trip and endure the jet lag that will accompany it.  Thank you for learning about a region of the world you previously hadn’t paid as much attention to. Thank you for seeing our lives here, not just the hole left in your heart, but as our lives that we are pouring ourselves into – the work, the people, the friendships, the study! Thank you for possessing the courage and humility it takes to acknowledge and appreciate that and to not insist that the only good place for us to live is near you (though that would be good too).

Before we left, so many people said, “Oh, your poor parents. So far from their children and grandchildren.” But you raised us to care about the world, to follow the Father’s leading, to seek His will, and to love the nations. Thank you for living this way and for passing it on the next and next generations.

Thank you for making it abundantly clear that no matter where we live, we are loved. I could never have asked for a better mom, mother-in-law, or grandparents to our kids. We love you and we miss you!  Happy Mother’s Day from all of us!IMG_7211 IMG_7645